{"id":144,"date":"2008-10-20T18:32:08","date_gmt":"2008-10-20T16:32:08","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/?p=144"},"modified":"2008-10-20T19:37:20","modified_gmt":"2008-10-20T17:37:20","slug":"the-last-holy-land-charger","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/archives\/144","title":{"rendered":"The Last Holy Land Charger"},"content":{"rendered":"<div dir=\"ltr>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\"><strong>The last holyland charger<\/strong><br \/>\nby Tamir Buchshtav<br \/>\nBased on &quot;Last Saskatchewan Pirate&quot; by the Arrogant Worms<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\">I used to have a farmer and he made a living fine,<br \/>\nI had a little cart to pull along the city line,<br \/>\nBut times where tough and though he tried,<br \/>\nThe money wasn\u2019t there.<br \/>\nThe baron came and killed the man,<br \/>\nAnd sold me at the faire.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\">I looked for every kind of job, the answer\u2019s always \u201cno.<br \/>\nBuy you now?\u201d they all would laugh. \u201cWe let our horses go.\u201d<br \/>\nThe butcher man, he paid for me a measly little sum,<br \/>\nBut I\u2019ve got to much pride to end up just another drum,<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\">So I thought \u201cwho gives a damn if all the farmers\u2019 down,<br \/>\nI\u2019m gonna bear a knight and fight in service to the crown!\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\"><em>Chorus:<br \/>\nCause it\u2019s a hee-ho hi-ho<br \/>\nCharging down the lane,<br \/>\nKilling all Saracens within the Holy Land,<br \/>\nAnd it\u2019s a hee-hay hi-hay<br \/>\nHeathens bar your homes,<br \/>\nWhen you see an armored donkey \u2018neath Jerusalem\u2019s golden dome<\/em><!--more--><em>!<\/em><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\"><em>Charge!<br \/>\n<\/em><br \/>\nWell, you think the local heathens would know that I\u2019m around,<br \/>\nBut just the other day I found an unprotected town,<br \/>\nI charged up down the middle, and they began to cower,<br \/>\nI torched the place and burned it and I caused them all to scatter.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\">A bridge that leads to Jordan spans the mighty river,<br \/>\nHeathens ride with so much fear their stomachs are a\u2019quiver,<br \/>\nCause they know that DONKEY KONG is waiting in the trees,<br \/>\nI\u2019ll charge the bridge and kill them all ignoring all their pleas.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\"><em>Chorus<\/em><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\">Assassin Jobe, he chased me, he was always getting close,<br \/>\nHe\u2019d follow far behind me cause he didn\u2019t own a horse,<br \/>\nBut missionaries caught him, the assassin changed his robes,<br \/>\nAnd now he\u2019s riding with us, and we call him Holy Jobe!<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\">A swinging sword, a mounted lance and pleasant company,<br \/>\nI never have to pull a cart and screw the butchery (screw it!)<br \/>\nFrom Jaffa down to Jericho, the terror of the land,<br \/>\nAnd if you try to pass me you\u2019ll be buried in the sand!<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\"><em>Chorus<\/em><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\">Well, a charger\u2019s life\u2019s appealing, and the fighting\u2019s always here,<br \/>\nI hear that in the desert the Saracen\u2019s coming near,<br \/>\nThey roam the barren wasteland down to Um Rashrash bay,<br \/>\nAnd they\u2019re sure to get medieval if you have to pass theirway,<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\">Well, winter is a\u2019coming and they say crusades are out,<br \/>\nMy charging days are over when our forces start to route,<br \/>\nI\u2019ll be back the next time but now it\u2019s time to go,<br \/>\nI hear there\u2019s lots of fighting going on near Monaco.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\"><em>Chorus X2<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[13],"tags":[8],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/144"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=144"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/144\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":257,"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/144\/revisions\/257"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=144"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=144"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=144"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}