{"id":191,"date":"2008-10-20T19:01:44","date_gmt":"2008-10-20T17:01:44","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/?p=191"},"modified":"2008-10-20T19:01:44","modified_gmt":"2008-10-20T17:01:44","slug":"the-last-of-the-schlimazel-team","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/archives\/191","title":{"rendered":"The last of the schlimazel team"},"content":{"rendered":"
\nThe last of the schlimazel team<\/strong>
\nby Tamir Buchshtav
\nbased on "Last of Barrett's Privateers" by Stan Rogers<\/p>\n

It was evening down in Eightgate town
\nHOW I WISH I WAS IN PORTWELL NOW!
\nA mission came from the priest of the sun,
\nTo go to the scummiest part of town,<\/p>\n

Chorus:
\nGod damn them all!
\nI was told we\u2019d pick a box that a merchant holds
\nWe\u2019d swing no swords, cast no spells
\nNow I\u2019m a lonely bard in a run down inn,
\nThe last of the schlimazel team
\n<\/em>
\nThe merchant, he showed us the box,
\nHOW I WISH I WAS IN PORTWELL NOW!
\nThe goods, he said, to us will pass,
\nFor just 500 gold from us!<\/p>\n

Chorus<\/em><\/p>\n

Our warrior maid, she told him then
\nHOW I WISH I WAS IN PORTWELL NOW!
\n\u201cWhy don\u2019t you just give it away?
\nWe know you\u2019ll mug us on our way.<\/p>\n

Chorus<\/em><\/p>\n

We took the box and went away
\nHOW I WISH I WAS IN PORTWELL NOW!
\nWhen on the alley just outside,
\nA bunch of thieves were want to hide,<\/p>\n

Chorus<\/em><\/p>\n

Our ranger he went up the wall,
\nHOW I WISH I WAS IN PORTWELL NOW!
\nBut then he fell just halfway up,
\nAnd landed on the priestess\u2019 rump.<\/p>\n

Chorus<\/em><\/p>\n

The paladin raised hammer high,
\nHOW I WISH I WAS IN PORTWELL NOW!
\nBut he slipped on something best left unsaid,
\nAnd joined the ranger and the maid,<\/p>\n

Chorus<\/em><\/p>\n

And me? I jumped over the pile
\nHOW I WISH I WAS IN PORTWELL NOW!
\nA perfect leap right to the fight,
\nThen the wall I stabbed with all my might<\/p>\n

Chorus<\/em><\/p>\n

We somehow won the dreadful fight
\nHOW I WISH I WAS IN PORTWELL NOW!
\nWe got the box to the temple\u2019s gate,
\nBut everyone heard of out fate!
\n
\nChorus<\/em>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The last of the schlimazel team by Tamir Buchshtav based on "Last of Barrett's Privateers" by Stan Rogers It was evening down in Eightgate town HOW I WISH I WAS IN PORTWELL NOW! A mission came from the priest of the sun, To go to the scummiest part of town, Chorus: God damn them all! […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[3,13],"tags":[8,134],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/191"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=191"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/191\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":192,"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/191\/revisions\/192"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=191"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=191"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.fuzzy-fish.com\/wordpress-he\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=191"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}