Fuzzy Fish

There's many imps you'll raise, me lad, in basements dark and damp.
There's horn-headed demons and hoof-legged fiends, and the bad old Devil himself.
There's sacrifice and rituals and incense sharp or stale,
But I think I'll say the fastest way is 666-HELL.

Chorus:
666-HELL me lad, 666-HELL,
The finest demons in the world are waiting for your spell.
You can send them at your enemies, cast curses dark and fell,
Just take the phone and call us now, dial 666-HELL.

It started down in the nether realms one lazy summer day,
When the Lord of Flies went to the Boss and had a thing to say,
“Why don’t we make it easier to summon fiends to earth?
Old fashioned rituals are fine, but aren’t known for stealth.”

Chorus

The Devil took a while to think, then saw that he was right,
Much easier to gain more souls and spread unholy blight,
It took a while to find a scheme to make it tame and fast,
Then they took a phone and hooked it up, and now it’s here at last.

Chorus

In yellow pages now it shows, as clear as black on white,
And raising fiends is a piece of cake for anyone with sight,
It’s hell on earth, Armageddon, damnation far and wide,
With summoners on every street not bothering to hide.

Chorus

There’s many imps you’ll raise me lad, reliably and fast,
With the end of days approaching us, you’ll get your share at last,
Just take the phone and call the fiends, make sure you’re in the game,
And if you don’t turn evil now, you’ve just yourself to blame!

666-HELL me lad, 666-HELL,
The finest demons in the world are waiting for your spell,
You can send them at your enemies, cast curses dark and fell,
You can raise a fiend in record time, you don’t even have to chant and rhyme,
Just take a phone, insert a dime, dial 666-HELL!